Dominican masculinity is at the center of Oscar’s problems
in the novel. Male success in Dominican society seems to have a strong
correlation with the number of girls someone has been with. A fact confirmed
when Yunior says it is “against the laws of nature for a dominicano to die
without fucking at least once” (174). Oscar’s personal definition of success is
similar to this, but Oscar is more concerned with the quality of a relationship
rather than quantity. To Oscar girls were “the beginning and the end, the Alpha
and the Omega, the DC and the Marvel” (173). In other words, women were the
most important part of Oscar’s life. His nonexistent love life fails both his
standards as well as Dominican society’s, and as a result no one in the novel
is able to understand Oscar. Oscar slips in and out of depression in his
college years. He’s still unable to communicate his own feelings and eventually
tries to kill himself again (190). I think the source of Oscar’s problems is
his own failure to meet his own standards and those of Dominican society.
Most characters in the novel think Oscar needs to change his
lifestyle to fit in. Yunior tries to help Oscar with his “problems.” When trying
to give Oscar advice, Yunior says “But yourself sucks!” and Oscar replies
saying “It is, lamentably, all I have” (174). The word lamentable shows how
Oscar realizes he doesn't fit in, but by saying it’s all he has he also
acknowledges that he doesn't think he can change. Lola is the one character in
the novel who cares about Oscar and doesn't try to change him. I think it is
interesting how Lola is also the only other character in the book so far who
defies the model of Dominican masculinity. The role of the stereotypical female
in the novel is to be subservient to males, but Lola acts as an independent,
outspoken woman. Oscar and Lola are similar in the defiance they show in
fitting the Dominican stereotypes, but they are both so different at the same
time. I think Lola has the attitude of a Dominican male while Oscar’s attitude
is more like that of the Dominican female. Looking at the various ways
masculinity shapes Oscar’s life helped me understand why he is so discontented
and depressed.
I completely agree with your claim about the reversed gender roles Lola and Oscar take on. In class we described Oscar as being somewhat of a "misfit" and the first thing that came to my mind was how Lola is also a "misfit" in many aspects. Both refuse to conform to the ideals of Dominican gender roles. I think Oscar primarily feels inadequate. As you said, he fails to live up to the relationship expectations for most young Dominican males, and he most definitely doesn't fit the physical expectations for most people in general. Oscar also doesn't take a dominant position in any of his relationships. Even with his own sister he seems to struggle standing up for himself and there are only two times in the novel where he physically confronts someone (first on page 46 when Oscar hits Miggs and then on page 179 when he shoves Yunior). In contrast, Lola seems to feel angry and unheard most of the time. She prefers men who don’t fit the typical Dominican male stereotype after her first failed relationship. Lola is the object of desire for many Dominican men, and yet she takes on life with a no-nonsense attitude and is the exact opposite of submissive. In this way, Lola and Oscar are completely the same in their attitudes/expectations about relationships, but very different in how they interact with and are perceived by others in the world.
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