*This
draws upon material from most of the book, including up to page 248
One interesting part of We Are All Completely
Beside Ourselves is the role memory plays in the story. Most of the story
is told from two time periods, those being Rosemary’s time in college and her
time as a youth. Thus much of the story is a retelling of Rosemary’s memories
and her feelings about them now. Yet despite the volumes of memories described
throughout the book, Rosemary is very unclear about how precise memory can be,
and she discusses this uncertainty throughout the course of the story.
Some instances show that memory is quite precise and
powerful. Rosemary goes into exquisite detail about a memory of her mother
reading to her and Fern, a memory she says occurred at age three. Details
include Fern drifting into sleep, “one eyelid fluttering, one ear blooming like
a poppy from her black fur” (94). These are precise descriptions from a very
early age, and Rosemary has no reservations about them being genuine. The power
of this memory comes from Rosemary’s explicit sense of betrayal that follows
several sentences later when she is scolded for asking too many question, for
she assumes that Fern wanted to know too but was simply unable to ask. Fern, in
Rosemary’s mind, is unjustly sharing in the benefits of her curiosity without
taking any of the disadvantages. Another example of precise memory is the last
memory Rosemary has of Lowell before he leaves. She recalls that she went into
his room, where “Lowell was lying facedown on his bed, feet on his pillow, head
at the foot” (116). She also remembers him yelling and cussing at her, his face
“red, wet, and puffy as a cloud” (116). Her ability is instantly recall this
memory shows that the power of memory can sometimes be instantly at her beck
and call, yet this is also shown to elude her at other points in the novel.
The most telling example of faulty memory is when
Lowell tells his sister why Fern left, the reason being that she “made Mom and
Dad choose,… you or her” (222). Rosemary doesn’t recall this, as she later
explains that her memory of the incident that made Fern leave “is only as vivid
to me as the one it replaces” (248). This is based off the Sigmund Freud theory
that “we have no early childhood memories at all”, and instead only have
fabrications that suit our current needs (247).
If Rosemary can recall a memory as important as the
last time she saw Lowell, why can’t she be sure about the same experience with
Fern? This draws serious debate about whether early memory is valid, and if
this is even important or not. Rosemary’s memory is both detailed and foggy,
with no explanation found for this in the severity of the events. She remembers
trivial and important memories well, yet forgets both just the same. The
meaning of memory is complicated, and the entirety of the story hinges upon it.
I think memory is heavily dependent on the emotions we felt at the time of the event. We remember our past experiences better if there was an emotional string attached to it. I think the part of the reason why Rosemary's memories are unreliable is due to the complex set of emotions she was going through at the time (and her young age as well). She says "Her [Fern] disappearance represented many things - confusions, insecurities, betrays, a Gordian knot of interpersonal complications" (111). It seems like Rosemary wasn't even sure exactly how she felt at the time, and coupled with recalling events from her young childhood, I think it is inevitable that her memory is unreliable/cloudy and molded by her current feelings and conjectures. I think the Freud quote you mentioned show this quite well. "what we have instead are false memories aroused later and more pertinent to this latter perspective than to the original events.......matters of great emotion.... comes to replace another" (247). Although I would like to add that this "matter of great emotion" probably has some roots from the feelings felt at the time of these events. Since Rosemary went as far as to call the situation a Gordian knot, confusion might be the biggest factor influencing her memory. Lowell’s story does not match the events she remembers, and coupled with the mixed emotions she felt at the time, she is trying to piece together all the information she has to tell the story. Perhaps she is unknowingly altering them to fit her current representation, leading to this inconsistency in detail and reliability we see.
ReplyDeleteBesides the fact that Rosemary is at a different age when Lowell leaves, I think that the above commenter is right when it is said that the memory is correlated with the emotions. I believe that Rosemary's memory may not be completely accurate, but it is valid because it is how Rosemary recalls the event. Since Rosemary is telling us the story, what is said convicts how the memory affected her at the time. Fern probably wasn't as much of an angel as Rosemary conveys her to be. She's a chimpanzee; there were probably times when Fern made her mom and dad angry or frustrated. However, Rosemary felt a great bond with Fern. She compares it to the bonding of a twin, saying "I hear there is no comparable loss to a twin...identical twins suffer the most, followed by fraternals. Extend that scale awhile and you'll eventually you'll get to Fern and me (108). I think that Rosemary's coping mechanism to Fern's loss is to remember her in the most positive way. She never really comments on the incredible likelihood of Fern being destructive; Fern is most always remembered in a kind way or in the way of a sibling. While Rosemary's memory of Fern may not be accurate, it is valid because it projects on the effects of how painful the loss of such a kind creature was to Rosemary.
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